//Collateral Intentions is a contemplative memoir expressed through 11 years of Constantine Dhonau’s journal entries, poems, short stories, and letters from ages 17 to 28. He encourages us to embrace the unknown as he bares naked the “collateral intentions” of his choices; those heartfelt efforts which turned against us and those mistakes which became our greatest blessings, in time.
Each neuron firing on thought, reflection, and movement//
Each application of pressure of pen onto paper//
Each turning of a page//
Each opening and closing of a journal//
11 years of momentum crash into a cliff face of culmination
poetry//short stories//journal entries//letters
dance together in a raw exposé of humanity
This inhaling and exhaling
Of Life and Death
The Breath of Life
The Last Gasp of Death
Chaotic dispersion of energy into the ether. Life shakes Death’s hand to pull soul into vessel. The aging and degradation of life. The renewal and release of death. An old soul handed across many times over. A soul is born in the cosmos so that the Universe may witness itself.
In death, we expand through the ether. We fold through dimensions. We seep through the membrane of time. We explore without boundary the sheet of our spirit until the tension of life is properly released to the stars remaining in placidity, riding the surface waves of forces unknown, until we feel the gentle tiffing of consciousness dawn us back to the order of life once more; until we are prepared to bring awareness to another body, to be sustained by the challenge of survival, the longing of love—to experience again time, relief, pain, waiting, to be bound-up by a moment instead of stretched through the eternal.
The Reaper of Death ushers order to chaos. The Breath of Life collects the soul into a living system. Energy is taken and given. The lapping waves of eternity wash a soul to shore and reclaim another with the retreating tide. Such is time—but the beating of a heart.
All the soul’s experience of time relative to the cadence of a pulse, the circulation of fluid, the call and response of electricity. The warmth of the light of life. The cold of Death’s dark vacuum. Both giving and receiving—a great swirling of fluid forces—that ether of soul and cosmos, waxing and waning in its stretch across the infinite, and back to the singularity of the soul. The eternal churning of forces between chaos and order. We move through life and death with patient persistence.
All becomes one and one becomes all. Nothing gained or lost—but transfigured through perpetual motion of energy. When we stop what we are doing—to cease the micro-movements of our lives and attune to the greater movement around us—we begin to reach across life and feel its pulse.
Why do we personify Death so precisely as the solitary Reaper—that singular, ominous force? We leave unimagined a single entity for life: one being, which presents itself to our collective consciousness as the arbiter, which claims our soul from the tranquil abyss to live again.
What is the pleasure of life and death but to be swept up in the current?
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4 out of 4 Stars!
"...Collateral Intentions is the perfect blend of action, adventure, suspense, education, and inspiration. Constantine is an excellent storyteller and an exceptional poet. I like everything about this book...One of this book's most vital elements was the author's expressive style. I could feel all the emotions reeling out of every line, especially in the poems. The descriptions were so vivid that they painted images in my head of what the author was communicating. Take, for instance, these lines from "Cascade:" "Feel it's long, massaging arms; Kissing each uncovered pore; Bring the scent of wild love; Pouring over from above."...Collateral Intentions induces self-reflection. It makes one reminisce about life and encourages self-growth. I rate this book 4 out of 4 stars because it is an exceptional read. There are a few errors, but they don't impede the book's flow. I recommend this book to every teenager and adult passing through hard storms of indecision in the present stage of their life; this book is a sure guide on overcoming such indecision. This book will especially appeal to poetry lovers. The author's poetry skill is top-notch, and the themes are both entertaining and informative."
//Constantine was born in St. Petersburg, Florida and raised by his mother and his aunt, with the help of several formative programs: Cub Scouts, Boy Scouts, Venture Crew, and Sea Scouts. He spent 3 years as the front man for a Tampa ska/punk band: H1N1. After overcoming blind rebellion of “the system,” he attended St. Petersburg College for his Associate of Arts and New College of Florida for his Bachelor of Arts in Psychology.
He made his initial escape to Colorado in 2015—degrees in-hand—in search of his independence, dedicating a year of service to City Year Denver of AmeriCorps. There, he discovered a new passion and direction in life: wilderness therapy. He pursued his first and only dream and vision in life with ferocity to become a field guide with Open Sky Wilderness Therapy, completing nearly 550 days in the field.
He enjoys writing,
tea, cooking, brooding, dancing, yoga,
astronomy, reprehensibly long walks, movies, being outdoors
etc. & suchforth//